Are You Devoted to Your Joy??

I put two question marks because it’s such a big, important, pertinent question! Especially for someone like me who has experienced a great deal of anxiety, depression, and chronic illness throughout my life. 

And especially when, as I quote from an opinion piece, “The dangers posed to international peace and security and the global economy, not to mention internal democratic norms, by Donald Trump’s presidency in the US has created a situation of extreme peril”.

And especially if you are suffering from any of the infinite number of the traumas and stressful events that can affect us.

Joy? Where does joy come into that equation? The answer is – it doesn’t.  Until we put it into the equation that is.

What if you were to work on your joy instead of working on your issues?  This is what I am up to at present, and while I can’t claim for a moment to find it easy to stay on track I love having chosen that as an intention.

We’re always faced with moment by moment choices from the time we wake up in the morning. Shall I get up now or spend a few more moments in bed?  What will I wear today?  On and on until we choose what time to get back into bed. 

These are choices about taking action but we also make choices about how we feel.  The trouble is we have a habit of responding to conditions – the things we perceive are happening around us – and we’re also unaware of many of the resistances and belief systems that lead to emotions we’d rather not feel.  In the past I’ve worked very hard on my resistances and reactivity and also recognise that while I’m doing that I’m focusing on what I don’t want rather than what I do want.  

And this is what we tend to do – we say we want xyz but then focus on what we don’t have, we focus on what isn’t working. And given that we attract via our emotional vibration we create more of what we don’t want!  To be in emotional vibration with what we want is very challenging – I know what it is like to feel really ill and to know I need to stay focussed on wellness.  

So, knowing too, that what you focus on is where your energy goes, what better than to set an intention to devote yourself to your own joy.  It’s like setting a direction in a yacht and every time you go off course, which, if you’re like me, is very frequently, you adjust – back to carrying out your intention.  I recently saw how following your joy could work.   

One of my friends has suffered from life long anorexia and has spent a lot of time at an eating disorders clinic which she hates.  She recently went on a 13 day cruise for the first time and absolutely loved every moment of it. When I saw her after it I couldn’t believe how different she looked, although she was bemoaning being back home again. I was able to point out how wonderful it was that now she had found what she enjoyed so much she could go and do that instead of going into the clinic.  Bingo!

Many of my clients have been devoted to pleasing other people – because they want to be liked, because they don’t want to upset or disappoint the other person, they don’t want to appear selfish, because they are afraid of the other’s person’s rejection, anger or criticism, because they don’t think they are deserving of meeting their own needs.  

Ultimately not having integrity with your own needs leads to resentment while the remedy is to learn how to provide all the love, acceptance and self worth that you need to yourself – and to devote yourself your own joy.  This isn’t selfish – the world could do with a few doses of joy! 

Because this is a challenging as well as a wonderful task here are some suggestions for how to support yourself. 

1. Tapping!  It’s the fastest way I know of resolving the emotional states and belief systems that are not conducive to your joy.  If you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, stressed, angry and not good enough then you are out of alignment with your intention.  You have the power to process what you’re feeling and convert it to more positive or higher vibrational feelings as well as more supportive and resourceful beliefs.  I have no concept of what my life would be like without tapping.
2. The wonderful Abraham Hicks who teach about the Law of Attraction and how to manifest what you want, suggest choosing “a better feeling thought” in any given moment.  i.e. notice what you are thinking that is causing the emotional response and pick a thought that makes you feel better in some way.  This of course, as with tapping, can be incremental.  It’s pretty hard to go from depression to joy in one fell swoop!  One step at a time, one thought at a time.
3. Spend time working on the connection between your inner adult and inner child. Listen to what your inner child enjoys doing most and then your adult can take action to bring it to fruition.  One of my clients is making plans to work 4 days a week in her corporate role so she can spend the time on herself that she knows she needs. 

And now I’ve written this article I’m off to dance class!  

Drop me a line and let me know how setting the intention to be devoted to your own joy makes a difference in your life.